So I'm back on my HGTV bullshit again, and I just watched an episode where Egypt and Mike designed "the ultimate bachelor pad" for a dude who plans to entertain his friends and family for cards and football games, and who has two enormous dogs, and they put a WHITE COUCH in his living room. Who DOES that?
Otherwise, it was a nice reno - the three-seasons deck especially. But a white couch just seems like a terrible idea for 99% of people, let alone a guy with 2 huge dogs.
It’s that time of year again where I always manage to get COVID. I have gotten COVID literally every single year since 2020, and pretty much exclusively around the holidays. I also happen to be flying to San Francisco this week and hanging out with a bunch of people while there, so I figured today was a good day to walk into my local Kroger and get a COVID shot.
Well, I ended up leaving without one, as I was told that unless I had a medical diagnosis or condition that required I get one per a doctor’s order, I couldn’t get one. I was baffled, since I could’ve sworn that for the past five years Kroger has been nonstop advertising walk-in vaccines, so I inquired further. I was told that it’s because of the new administration. Because why wouldn’t that be the reason?
Basically, she said that unless I had a “reason” to get the shot, my insurance wasn’t going to cover it. So I asked what if I just paid out of pocket, and she said it would be over two hundred dollars, and that I should try CVS or Walgreens to see if it was cheaper there.
I’m literally just, like, dumbfounded right now. I know that (thankfully) I can just pay out of pocket, or try a different place, or see if they’ll accept insurance or whatever, but what the fuck? Needing insurance to get a vaccine is bullshit. Needing a reason to get a vaccine is bullshit. I walked in to a clinic that advertised walk-in COVID shots, and left without one. That’s bullshit!
Anyway, I just wanted to come on here and vent, and see if anyone else has had a similar experience in the past few months? I want to get a flu shot, as well, and I’m hoping I don’t run into the same fucking issue.
We’ve come to that time of the year again, where folks begin to think about their holiday gift giving, and at least some of you think about books as the perfect gift. Well, they are! But would make them even more perfect is getting those books signed and personalized. Every year I join forces with Jay and Mary’s Book Center in Troy, Ohio, to sign and personalize books so that you’ll have them available to give to the people you love, including yourself.
From today (Nov. 11) through Friday, December 5, you can order books I have written from Jay and Mary’s and I will come in and sign them for you, and then the bookstore will ship them to you (US only). I strongly encourage you to get your orders in early, so there are no delays in shipping the books to you this holiday season.
Here’s how to do it!
1. Call Jay & Mary’s at their number (937 335 1167) and let them know that you’d like to order signed copies of my books. Please call rather than send e-mail; they find it easier to keep track of things that way.
2. Tell them which books you would like (For example, The Shattering Peace ), and what, if any, names you would like the book signed to. If there’s something specific you’d like written in the books let them know, but for their sake and mine, please keep it short. Also, if you’re ordering the book as a gift, make sure you’re clear about whose name the book is being signed to. If this is unclear, I will avoid using a specific name.
3. Order any other books you might think you’d like, written by other people, because hey, you’ve already called a bookstore for books, and helping local independent bookstores is a good thing. I won’t sign these, unless for some perverse reason you want me to, in which case, sure, why not.
4. Give them your mailing address and billing information, etc.
5. And that’s it! Shortly thereafter I will go to the store and sign your books for you.
Again, the deadline for signed/personalized books for 2025 is December 5. After December 5 all Scalzi stock will still be signed and available, but I will likely not be able to personalize.
Also, this is open to US addresses only. Sorry, rest of the world. It’s a cost of shipping thing.
What books are available?
CURRENT HARDCOVER: There are two current hardcovers: When the Moon Hits Your Eye and The Shattering Peace, both of which came out this year. In addition, there may be hardcovers available for Starter Villain, but ask first, as it’s primarily in trade paperback at this point. There is another hardcover out, Constituent Service, but it is a limited edition, and you would need to get it through the publisher, Subterranean Press.
CURRENT TRADE PAPERBACK: As of now, the first six books of the Old Man’s War series (Old Man’s War, The Ghost Bridages, The Last Colony, Zoe’s Tale, The Human Division, The End of All Things) are available in trade paperback with matching cover treatments, so if you wanted to give those six books as a gift, they are all now a matching set. Other books in trade paperback: Starter Villain, The Kaiju Preservation Society, The Android’s Dream, Agent to the Stars and Fuzzy Nation, Redshirts (the 2013 Hugo Award winner), Twenty-First Century Science Fiction (which features a story of mine), Metatropolis (which I edited and contribute a novella to) are all also available in trade paperback format. Also available: Robots Vs. Fairies, the anthology that features the story of mine that was adapted for the “Three Robots” episode of the Netflix animated series Love, Death and Robots.
CURRENT MASS MARKET PAPERBACK: The entire Interdependency series (The Collapsing Empire, The Consuming Fire and The Last Emperox) are available, both individually and as a boxed set. The fist six books of the Old Man’s War series (Old Man’s War, The Ghost Brigades, The Last Colony, Zoe’s Tale, The Human Division and The End of All Things) are available individually, and the first three of those books also come in their own boxed set (note, however, that the series is transitioning to trade paperback). Lock In, Head On and Unlocked: An Oral History of the Haden Syndrome (novella) are individually available as well. Fuzzy Nation, Agent to the Stars and The Android’s Dream have recently been moved into trade paperback, but mass market editions are probably still available if that’s your preference. Please note: If you order the boxed sets, if you want those signed you’ll have to agree to let me take the shrinkwrap off. In return I’ll sign each of the books in the box.
CURRENT NON-FICTION: Your Hate Mail Will Be Graded (essay collection, Hugo winner), The Mallet of Loving Correction (also an essay collection, this will need to be special ordered as it is a signed limited), Virtue Signaling (a third essay collection, will also need special ordering) and Don’t Live For Your Obituary (a collection of essays about writing, will also need to be special ordered).
AUDIOBOOKS: The Kaiju Preservation Society, The Last Emperox, The Consuming Fire, The Collapsing Empire, The Dispatcher, The End of All Things, Lock In, Head On,The Human Division, Redshirts, Fuzzy Nation, The God Engines, Metatropolis and Agent to the Stars are all available on CD and/or MP3 CD, and Jay & Mary’s should be able to special order them for you. Check with them about other titles, which may or may not be currently available on CD.
Two things regarding audiobooks: First, if you want these, you should probably call to order these as soon as possible. Second, and this is important, because the audiobooks come shrinkwrapped, I will have to remove the shrinkwrap in order to sign the cover. You ordering a signed audiobook means you’re okay with me doing that and with Jay & Mary’s shipping it to you out of its shrinkwrap.
If you have any other questions, drop them in the comment thread and I’ll try to answer them!
Bakers, with Thanksgiving coming up, I think you need to see this.
This, my friends, is a turkey.
Now, I know this comes as a shock. After all, you've been lied to all these years! But then, how could you possibly have known that turkeys actually DON'T all come in cans?
Now that's what we call a "can-doo" attitude!
In fact, when you think about it, it's really only natural to assume a turkey with a head injury bleeds rainbows:
Or that baby turkeys are cute enough to turn even hardened carnivores into raw vegans:
"Please, sir, might you consider the tofurkey this year? I hear it's lovely with a bit of quinoa."
Of course, some of you chose to model your turkeys on other things.
Like flamingos...
Or your least favorite cousin...
Or, from the looks of things, your last colonoscopy:
"Personally, I've taken a shine to the 'frizzy fecal' style."
Still, the good news is you bakers have always known exactly what a turkey sounds like:
Honestly, it's uncanny.
Thanks to Scott A., Kathryn S., Beth P., D.W., Dion H., Karen, & Mike B. for inspiring me to shout "gooble gooble!" at every lawn flamingo I see. That's right, neighbors, who's the "antisocial recluse" now? Huh? HUH?!
*****
Have y'all tried nail wraps? They're all the rage, my friends love them - but the brand names cost about $8 a set. I found this Fall collection on Amazon with decent reviews, though, and you get a dozen sets for only $13:
Norton Anti-Virus. O! How I hate thee, Norton Anti-Virus.
I had anti-virus software at home free from my job. This, of course, evaporated when I retired. Darwin already had Norton on his computer, so we just extended his subscription to me.
It was a disaster.
Norton wants to run my computer. It refused to allow certain perfectly safe programs to operate. It throttled back my internet connection so badly, I could only visit a handful of sites. It refused to allow me to pause its protection or stop it from throttling (and I wanted to throttle it back). Their customer service is apparently very familiar with this problem (and why, pray, don't they FIX IT, then?). They said the solution is to uninstall Norton and re-install. With gritted teeth, I did this. It worked. For about three days. Then the problem started all over again.
I destroyed Norton on my computer. I mashed it, mangled it, and tore it into bits, which I burned.
Now I have Avast, which works perfectly well, is cheaper, and doesn't take over my computer.
- This New Yorker profile of Costco was super interesting, I thought, as I ordered several pounds of pecans from Costco to make holiday gifts for various co-workers.
- The Giants once again had a lead for most of a game and then lost, plus their rookie QB ended up with a concussion. I texted the family group chat that that should be enough to finally fire Brian Daboll, and sure enough, today he got canned. Woof. What a miserable few seasons it's been. Hopefully whoever the next coach is (and the current interim coach) will protect Dart a little better.
- Will the Rangers ever win a game at MSG this season???
- It's the 50th anniversary of the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald, so give the song a listen. It still makes me cry every time I hear it. "Does anyone know where the love of god goes / when the waves turn the minutes to hours?"
Yesterday, I had planned to spend today diligently working and typing up a fresh movie review for y’all. However, once it hit about eleven at night, I realized my shoulders were totally killing me! I was hurtin’ something fierce, and decided to look online and see if a local massage place I really like had any openings for Monday. Sadly, none were popping up, which I expected since it was so last minute.
So, I expanded my search to Dayton, and found somewhere that could fit me in at eleven am for a hot stone massage. It was a further drive, but I was desperate for some relief, as it was even starting to hurt to lay on my side because I was putting weight on my shoulders.
I figured after my morning massage I could head to the church for the afternoon and start working hard, but then as I was leaving the massage place, I saw a sushi restaurant across the street that had a big poster advertising 50% off all sushi because it’s a Monday. How could I possibly pass up a deal like that?!
So after my massage, I treated myself to a very satisfying half priced sushi lunch (with amazing red bean ice cream for dessert). Then I still had an hour drive back home and one thing led to another and now here I am, telling you all why I have not yet delivered unto you a movie review. Please forgive me, the hot stone massage and sushi were too strong, and now I must spend the rest of the day cozied up on the couch and full of rice.
I do want to take a second to talk about this massage I got, though, because it was very interesting for a couple different reasons.
For as long as I can remember, I have always had this desire to go to one of those massage places that’s in a seedy strip mall. The kind that has the windows blacked out and you’ve never heard of anyone going there, and you’re not entirely sure if you’d wake up in an ice bath or not.
Finally, I got to experience this. I love when these massage places just have huge posters in the windows of stock photos of people getting massages. It’s so specific! The glowing open sign and printer-paper-hours on the door really sold it for me. I had certainly seen sketchier in passing, but I was stoked nonetheless.
Not only were the hot stones fresh out of the Crock-Pot, but this lil’ middle aged lady had my whole ass out massaging my glutes. All of the fancy places I’ve been massaged at are very careful not to expose you too much, but this lady was determined to get IN there, and she accomplished her mission. Every damn inch of me was massaged, and you know what, I’m totally here for it.
I got a pretty cheap, pretty damn good massage, and I’ll probably go back honestly because I’m about to be ballin’ 0n a budget but I still want to get massaged, y’know?
All in all, an excellent Monday that I topped off with a delicious mocha milk tea. How’s your Monday going?
Today’s the day: Constituent Service, my humorous novella about the excitement of providing municipal services in a city district full of aliens, is now available in print and ebook! The print version is a signed limited edition, and there are at this moment fewer than 100 copies left, so if you want it and have not gotten it already, you’d be best to order it from Subterranean Press directly. The ebook edition, however, is endlessly plentiful and available at your favorite online retailer for about $6. Cheap!
This is a fun story and has everything: Karaoke! Spiderpuppies! Felonious chickens! And of course, a whole bunch of aliens, just trying to get through their day. I like it, but then I would. I hope you like it too.
Like a lot of people my age, I have two pair of eyeglasses: A pair with progressive lenses which are my general purpose glasses, suitable for looking at things at varying distances and generally being out in the world, and then a pair of fixed-focused lenses, which I use when I’m looking at a computer or reading or otherwise doing close up work.
It occurred to me yesterday that I could think about them another way as well: The progressive lenses are my extrovert glasses, the glasses I wear when I’m seeing other people, or doing events and appearances; the computer glasses are my introvert glasses, the ones I wear when I’m by myself, writing or answering email or making music or otherwise just off in a corner by myself. It’s rare for me to wear either pair of glasses in other contexts: the progressives aren’t great to wear with the computer, since I need to put my head at just the right angle for the slice of lens that will allow for close work, and the computer glasses do a poor job of focusing more than a yard out. Their use correlates quite impressively with when I’m being an introvert or extrovert.
I’m not sure how I never made this connection before, but now that I have made it, I can’t not see it. It’s the most concrete example I have of the two modes of my life and how they work with each other as I get along with my day. Suffice to say that unless you are family member, it is very unlikely that you will see me in my introvert glasses. I will have my extrovert glasses on to greet you.
My sister texted me yesterday to let me know she's sick so I shouldn't go over there today, so I did not. So today, instead of making pie, I made Chinese pork buns (pic). I made the pork yesterday and used the leftovers today - I used boneless country ribs because they are fairly cheap and I don't like dealing with bones. I can't seem to get a good boneless pork shoulder these days - last time I ordered a bone-in one, it was supposedly 3 lbs, but it was 2 lbs of bone and 1 of meat, which is not the best ratio for the money - so I go with the boneless country ribs instead (the ones from Costco are especially good).
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I shouldn't have been so enthusiastic the other day about how much better I've been sleeping, because of course, on Friday night, I had a terrible night's sleep, tossing and turning and just unable to stay asleep after several hours of trying to fall asleep. Last night was much better. *hands* Sometimes, it just be like that.
While I was lying awake, I was thinking about Dungeon Crawler Carl, as I have been wont to do lately, and trying to figure out his relationship with Bea, because I find it kind of baffling. ( spoilers through book 7 )
Shows: SGA Rec Category: Apocafic Characters: John Sheppard & Rodney McKay, Carson Beckett, Elizabeth Weir/Kate Heightmeyer (if you squint), Evan Lorne, Radek Zelenka, Aiden Ford, Stackhouse, Kavanagh, Chuck, Miko Kusanagi, Halling, Jeannie Miller, Wraith characters Categories: Gen (close McKay & Sheppard friendship) Words: 23,979 Warnings: The author chose not to warn (although there's secondary character death, there's no major character death) Author on DW:troyswann Author's Website:MSSalieri on AO3 Link:A Sudden Moon on AO3 Why This Must Be Read: This is a canon-divergent AU in which survivors of the expedition are forced to flee to a desolate alpha site when the Wraith take Atlantis and occupy it, leaving many expedition members behind, captured, and Sheppard lost. It's a powerful fic, with the main POVs being Elizabeth's as she desperately tries to hold the survivors together in the face of disaster while grappling with impossible life and death decisions, and Rodney's, as he mourns Sheppard in stunned rage, then undertakes a desperate Hail Mary ploy on which the fate of the expedition, Earth, and the Milky Way galaxy depend. The characterizations and writing are wonderful, from Elizabeth's exhausted determination to Kate and Radek's strength and humor, to Rodney's complex, fracturing psyche as the effects of his plan take hold. It's a tough read in places, but hang in there for the ending. Very much recommended.
I'm a night owl by trade. When I was younger, I'd happily stay up until one in the morning or later (earlier?) and sleep until eight or nine. I volunteered to work the closing shift at my fast food job. I scheduled my college class to avoid early classes. The few times I had to take an 8:00 class, I was miserable. And boy, do I hate getting up before sunrise!
Then I was hired to teach high school.
This job required me to be a morning person, bright and cheerful and bushy-tailed at 7:00 AM every school day. It had to be done, so I faked it. For 30 years, I showed up at work. In the dark. Pretending I was thrilled be awake and in my classroom with my students, who were themselves surly and half asleep.
The moment any vacation--winter, spring, mid-winter, summer--started, I'd go right back to staying up late. The trouble was, though, that my body had learned that I'm supposed to be up at 5:30. No matter how late I was up the night before, I would wake up at 6:30 or 7:00, fully awake and feeling like I'd slept way in. Even during summer break, I'd be up by 7:00, 8:00 at the absolute latest. And having kids, of course, meant fewer chances to sleep in anyway.
Now I'm retired, and I've married another night-owl. The two of us are up until at least midnight most nights (the latest Darwin will stay up on work nights). When Darwin doesn't have to work, we're up until 1:00 or later. But I was still waking up at 7:00, feeling like I'd slept too long. The lack of actual sleep meant I'd want a nap partway through the day, and I don't like naps--the sleep hangover is awful. Was this going to go on for the rest of my life?
Fear not.
The last couple of weeks, I've been waking up at 8:00 or later. This morning, Darwin and I didn't get up until almost 9:30!
I'm loving this, I have you tell you. The two things I disliked most about my job were 1) grading essays; and 2) getting up inhumanly early, especially on dark, freezing winter mornings. Trudging into the school building before sunrise and seeing the sun come up toward the end of second hour was disheartening and grinding. Now? I sleep right through that awful part of the day, and I'm awake only well after sunrise. Same for Darwin. It's a little odd in that we aren't ready for lunch until two or three o'clock most days, but I'm good with that.
My internal clock has finally realized that I'm retired.
--Wendy’s is leveraging former Yum Brands’ CEO Greg Creed’s consulting firm to strengthen its brand positioning and enhance marketing effectiveness.
--In October, the company launched a “needs-based customer segmentation study,”
--“We’re segmenting consumers to make sure we have the most relevant segmentations to drive growth. Then we get into relevance, easy, and distinctive(ness), and the culmination is a brand essence.”
I play backgammon against a computer game a lot. One function of the game is to evaluate how well you play. The evaluation ranges from "awful" to "supernatural." Part of the evaluation also shows how good or bad your luck and the computer's luck was, ranging from "bad dice, man" to "go to Vegas."
Often, though, I get a strange evaluation. I might destroy the computer with a score of 8-0 or more (though this is rare) and I get a player evaluation of "average" or "casual", while the computer is set at "supernatural." But the luck factor is almost always "none," meaning neither side had particularly good or bad luck.
I don't understand this. If I'm an average or casual player and the computer is set at supernatural, I should win only if I have good luck and/or the computer has bad luck.
I have noticed that when the computer is in tutoring mode (it alerts you if you're going to make what it considers a bad move), it tells me to make a move that's clearly idiotic, such as leaving two blots in your home base when the computer has a blot on the bar. The computer is probably looking purely at odds and computing that the odds of me being blotted are higher than other moves being a problem. (?)
Most of the time when the computer points out a bad move, it's right, but it does have some strange ideas about poor strategy.
Anyway, the program is quirky but a good player. I just wonder at its evaluation methods.
Retitled Masquerade in Lodi and other novellas. (Which contains "Masquerade in Lodi", "The Orphans of Raspay" and "The Physicians of Vilnoc".)
This came last week, forwarded from my agent possibly in a fit of housecleaning. My author's copies of foreign editions drift in late, erratically, or not at all. (Translation copyright appears to be 2023, near as I can tell.) Anyway, excellent cover art again more-than-hinting that the artist actually read the stories, or at least the title story.
The challenge of how to represent the invisible entity Desdemona is interestingly solved with a sort of magical-monkey-on-his-back creation, which is... not-wrong. And it captures delightfully how Pen felt being dragged through that memorable night in Lodi by the unexpected saint of his Order.
The Art of Gluten-Free Bread: Groundbreaking Recipes for Artisanal Breads and Pastries, by Aran Goyoaga is a beautiful book, printed on heavy paper and with full-page color photographs of every bake. It's heavily weighted toward sourdough, with several chapters dedicated to its creation and maintenance, recipes for the discard such as cookies, waffles, and biscuits, and lots and lots of sourdough breads throughout.
The book does not utilize flour mixes of any kind. Ingredients include most of the gluten-free pantry as well as some more unlikely items like chestnut flour, and binders include flaxseed meal, psyllium husk powder, and xanthan gum. There's some butter, milk, and eggs, but Goyoaga makes an effort to provide dairy-free variations for most of the recipes, and there's even a vegan brioche.
Definitely give this a look if you're into sourdough or want to get into it. I absolutely can't be taking on another mouth to feed, though, so this book is of limited use to me and will be going back to the library, but first I think I'll try her brioche with vanilla and orange peel, as it sounds lovely.
No parking lot, but look! Men at work! Good for them. Dudes in high-viz is part of what makes America great.
I’m in town for the Texas Book Festival, and I have two events, one tomorrow and one on Sunday, plus I am participating in the LitCrawl on Saturday night. Here’s the Book Festival schedule, where you can look me up. Also, here is the Lit Crawl schedule, where you can also look me up. After each of the festival events I believe there will be a signing. Come see me! Don’t leave me here to eat brisket all on my own.
Imagine my excitement at reading this interview with Bob Mould this morning: How Bob Mould rediscovered the great, lost live Husker Du record not because of Hüsker Dü, whom I liked but didn't love, but because he mentions that Sugar reunited. I LOVED SUGAR!!! If I Can't Change Your Mind is 3 minutes of PURE POP PERFECTION and one of my top 5 songs of ALL TIME. Back in the 90s, I saw Bob live solo at least twice (once pressed right up to the stage beneath him and his guitar at...Irving Plaza? I think?), and saw Sugar in concert at least once (maybe twice?). Copper Blue is full of great songs, as is Bob's first solo album, Workbook. (Black Sheets of Rain was also good but less accessible, imo.)
If Sugar actually tours, I might leave the house to see them!
I have other, less fun, work news, but I should probably save it for a locked post sometime later. Sigh.
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Current Mood:excited
Current Music:standing on the edge of Hoover Dam, I am
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It’s that time of year again where I always manage to get COVID. I have gotten COVID literally every single year since 2020, and pretty much exclusively around the holidays. I also happen to be flying to San Francisco this week and hanging out with a bunch of people while there, so I figured today was a good day to walk into my local Kroger and get a COVID shot.
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